The Elements of Emotional Intelligence and Which Do You Need to Work On?

Emotional Intelligence (EIQ) is basically a measure just like IQ levels, but focuses on social and self-awareness rather than of general intelligence. Daniel Goleman defined it as the understanding and management of one’s own emotions as well as of those around them.

Elements of emotional intelligence are basically the term broken down into categories and factors that are used to measure how emotionally intelligent you are. Women tend to have higher Emotional IQs, but since this term is more subjective than objective, there is no fit scale to measure it.

You might be a house-wife or a working woman, but either way, you are unconsciously ‘managing’ how you feel by being aware of what others, like your teammates or your family members, feel around you. The question is, how well are you doing it, and what should you improve in order to be more emotionally managed?

Elements of Emotional Intelligence to Help You Manage Yourself and Others

Emotional Self-Awareness

Are you aware of what you are feeling right now, or are you living in denial? In order to manage yourself, it is extremely important to identify and address what your emotions are. If you are insecure about your appearance, you first need to identify this insecurity in order to get rid of it.

Emotional Self-Control

You might be aware of how you feel, but what if you put all your focus on just your emotions and forget about everything else? That wouldn’t be what a strong person’s approach. Emotions can be overwhelming, even if they are positive emotions, but losing control of those emotions leads to irrational thinking and impractical decisions.


Humans are made flexible, both physically and mentally. If you are finding it difficult to adjust to your new workplace and let it get to your mind, you may be only falling behind. Darwin’s theory, ‘Survival of the fittest’, focuses on how survival is for those who learn to adapt themselves into any environment.

Achievement Orientation

Achievement Orientation is your behavior and response towards goals or tasks. For example, if you have to buy grocery, cook dinner, and attend an important meeting in the evening all in one day, an achievement-oriented approach would be to list your tasks according to urgency and priority, and get them done without wasting time stressing over the burden of work.

Positive Outlook

Your perspective on life matters a lot in making you emotionally intelligent. Have you ever been around someone and just felt happier? That’s because they give positive vibes. If you have a high EIQ, you would have an optimistic approach to life in general.


Don’t confuse empathy with sympathy. Sympathizing with someone does not help anyone, while empathizing is about putting yourself in someone else’s place and then understanding their mindset and reasons. Empathy can help you understand people better. Psychologists do it too.

Organizational Awareness

This is one of those elements of emotional intelligence that may seem only business-related, but is household-related, too. Being aware of the ‘organization’ (whether your workplace or home) means that you understand the long-term goals, functionalities, and nature of the organization while knowing how your individual role contributes to the whole.


Do you follow any bloggers on Instagram or YouTube who have an influence on how you do things in your daily routine? Having influence over someone is done only when you are confident and happy in your own skin, so people follow you and want to learn from you.

Coach and Mentor

Coaching and mentoring are similar yet different terms. Coaching is a more formalized, time-specific teaching while mentoring is a more relationship-based approach. Either way, aim to be the coach and mentor in your social circle by helping people be the best versions of themselves.

Conflict Management

It is okay to disagree with or have conflicts in personal or professional relationships. If you are emotionally intelligent, you will try to identify the cause of the conflict, ensure it is not biased or unfair, and conclude the problem accordingly instead of letting negativity grow between you and the other party.


Working together is vital to growth, both personal and interpersonal. Whether it is a personal relationship or a group of colleagues at work, you should strive to work together with everyone. It is a great practice to improve your EIQ that comprises most of the elements mentioned in this list.

Inspirational Leadership

You don’t have to be a leader to be a leader. In easier words, people will follow your footsteps and look up to you even if you are not a formally appointed leader. How? Aim to inspire others by being a person who empathizes, understands, and acts wisely in all situations.


These elements of emotional intelligence are not abilities, but rather skills that you pick up and enhance with experience and time. You meet new people, you adjust in new environments, and you go through different emotional phases, but if you manage these elements well, you can be a well-organized, emotionally intelligent person.